Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Top 10 Reasons Why Men Shouldn't Be Ordained

My partner in ministry, Tara Healy posted this on her Facebook. As we have been considering planting a church together it is funny, to the point of frustration, how many are against women in ministry. I hope you enjoy the list as much as I did.

I receive this in an email and thought "How darkly funny!" Although this list we may consider absurd, we however do not apply that same absurdity to the list of restrictions to the ordination of women, when often reasons such as this exist as reasons to exclude women from ordination. Perhaps someday the list that is given about the exclusion of women will be just as "darkly funny" as this list. Enjoy and discuss!

Top 10 Reasons Why Men Shouldn't Be Ordained:

10. A man's place is in the army.

9. For men who have children, their duties might distract them from the responsibilities of being a parent.

8. Their physical build indicates that men are more suited to tasks such as chopping down trees and wrestling mountain lions. It would be "unnatural" for them to do other forms of work.

7. Man was created before woman. It is therefore obvious that man was a prototype. Thus, they represent an experiment, rather than the crowning achievement of creation.

6. Men are too emotional to be priests or pastors. This is easily demonstrated by their conduct at football games and watching basketball tournaments.

5. Some men are handsome; they will distract women worshipers.

4. To be ordained pastor is to nurture the congregation. But this is not a traditional male role. Rather, throughout history, women have been considered to be not only more skilled than men at nurturing, but also more frequently attracted to it. This makes them the obvious choice for ordination.

3. Men are overly prone to violence. No really manly man wants to settle disputes by any means other than by fighting about it. Thus, they would be poor role models, as well as being dangerously unstable in positions of leadership.

2. Men can still be involved in church activities, even without being ordained. They can sweep paths, repair the church roof, change the oil in the church vans, and maybe even lead the singing on Father's Day. By confining themselves to such traditional male roles, they can still be vitally important in the life of the Church.

1. In the New Testament account, the person who betrayed Jesus was a man. Thus, his lack of faith and ensuing punishment stands as a symbol of the subordinated position that all men should take.


WES ELLIS said...


Brian said...

Well done! Satire is sometimes the best way to be prophetic. You and John Stewart are two peas in a pod.

Michelle Van Loon said...


Anonymous said...

Oh, brother.

brian said...

Nicely done.

Pastorchick said...

As an ordained woman in ministry I have and am experiencing the effects of "no women". People regularly will say, "Your shoes are SO cute! And I liked your sermon too." Or I hear, "I don't like women in ministry, but I like you so I guess it's okay." My favorite this past week occured when two men were having a conversation regarding my skills, leadership and overall ability to pastor. They both agreed that I am gifted and a gift to the church. Taking it a step further, Bob said, "Well, she is doing the senior pastor role. She has been doing it for 7 months, we should call her as the Senior Pastor." To which the other man replied,"Oh, she has what it takes, but it is a shame. She can't be the senior pastor. The Bible forbids women from being Senior Pastors."

Incredulous. This is my life as an ordained woman in ministry.

This "List" made me smile. Thanks!

Lori Jean said...

LOL Good one. I love pointing out the absurdity of it all!